Kate David - creating gardens of dreams

From the very first day I met Kate (virtually), she has always exuded the energy of the Fairy Godmother, with her wisdom mixed with playfulness and a warm voice. Who would not want her to come over and turn your yard into the garden of dreams?

Many were the reasons for asking Kate to get on IHG. One was that she had a revenue leap in her genius business and I was curious to know what changed. How did her business get to the next level, and can that be of inspiration to someone else?

But an even better reason for telling Kate’s story is the way she stumbled upon her genius, after years and years of doing just about anything to make ends meet. Perhaps… it’s true, should our parents truly observe our early inclinations and help us nurture them… we wouldn’t spend years and years lost looking for that one thing that’s ours. Yet we won’t allow it to resurface to the front of our consciousness because, maybe, we’re meant to lose it momentarily, to pick up other skills and life experiences.

… I suddenly had a Kundalini awakening, and what followed was staying up well through the night feverishly journaling. A weird thing about a Kundalini awakening is you have spontaneous yoga poses come on, and I haven’t done yoga since I was in my twenties so it’s been 20 years since I’ve done yoga! The next thing I know I’m doing back-arching poses in my kitchen at 5 AM because I can’t sleep. I’m just filled with energy, inspiration, and flow. It’s as if someone lets you peek behind the veil and… Oh yeah, I can’t go back to business as usual.

That’s when I jumped. I joined the elite coaching program I was invited to. And so far it’s been a wild ride… it does feel like I’m running with the big dogs. These are people who are doing exciting things and just tackling big things in their own life. I can’t describe it but what I mean is it’s been a real equalizer for me because I just realized we’re all just people doing our best. Sometimes my problems are not so different from those I’ve put on a pedestal. 

Tell me about running with the big dogs…

This is what I know: I know who I am, and I have a business that is growing and thriving, yet still I feel there is a destination unknown. I feel still that this is not my endpoint. I reached a point of clarity that allowed me to see, Oh I’m in the right lane but there is something more, there is something beyond that I cannot see. 

What I see in the elite coaching group is that those are the people who have achieved a sort of level of success financially, personally, all of that. In a lot of ways, I don’t fit that profile because I’m still clawing my way toward an unknown destination.

What I noticed about these “big dogs” is that they’re insanely self-aware. When they see an ego slip or their own shadow: they waste no time and pull it apart to push to the next level. There is a greater intensity to their inner work. Everyone there is committed to the total meat and potatoes of pulling out shadow, pulling out what the next step is… And everything is actionable! It’s big energy and at times it’s confrontational energy but these people do not put their heads under the sand, ever. When they’re triggered, they admit it and push it even deeper. 

Do you think anything changed in the way you express your genius?

Well, I’ve been uncovering a set of gifts that at the moment I still don’t know what it means. Like, certain animals and plants started coming to me in my dreams. Ok, we’re going to get a little weird…

It’s like having little signposts. Ribes sanguineum came into my dream, or even an Iris - which in my dream was called a flag which is a type of yellow iris that grows near water. This is not an expression we use here in the US, but I’ve looked it up and it’s an old English word. It’s meant to symbolize power and the three parts are meant to represent wisdom, faith, and courage. I’ve been recording my dreams for the past 6 months and it’s not something I go and tell people. I’ve been having synchronicities and foretelling dreams… 

So I feel that the further I go down this road, the more I am invited to listen to my instincts.

For example, when I’m creating a container or a garden, I used to be really in my head about it, Uh is this the right choice? Should I do this? Instead, I actually just step back and take my head out of the equation now. And I just put little plants in places and wait for that sort of “light switch” in my heart and chest. If it goes up, that’s the right choice; if it goes down or stays neutral, then we move on and try something new. And so, No take away that rose, No I need more texture, No… And I play with that internal light switch until I feel “Yeah, uh there she is.”

It’s learning that muscle and learning to trust that gut. And get out of my head and get out of my own way. I find that the more I get out of my mental space, the better more aligned decisions I make. 

What were you doing before you stumbled upon gardening?

When I look back at my childhood, it was always very clear what I should’ve been doing.

My mom actually just dropped off a book of mine from childhood, it’s called The Plantsitter. And when I look at all my favourite books from childhood they were all about just playing with plants in the natural world, and about adventure. When I was about 12 years old, I remember standing in this garden I’d created and my dad has ripped a giant fatsia that was growing in front of my bedroom window. I had dug about a 3 ft deep and 10 ft long patch and planted the entire thing with wildflowers, and I would be out there collecting seeds, putting them in envelopes, and labeling them. I was doing all this stuff instinctually! No one taught me any of this but I was out there studying the plants, I was looking at them and experimenting instinctually.

Now, looking back at the 11-12-year-old girl, of course, that’s what I should’ve been doing. But you grow up and life piles things on you and I went through a series of jobs: I worked for an airline doing reservations; I worked for my uncle’s startup, he owned a pre-press business; I worked for a little at a graduate school; then I worked for a home builder. Then what’s interesting is that when I had my son Brody, who’s the oldest and is now 14, I was hit with this urge to grow something. I bought a packet of tomato seeds and I started …. all of them. It was such a rookie move because I ended up with 24 tomato plants…

LOL, I literally did this rookie move this year. All the 15 aubergine seeds and about 20 tomato seeds, plus peas, edamame, and lots of others: they all sprouted and I was like WTF am I gonna do now with all this???

Yes, they all grow! So that year I ended up giving away 20 tomato plants and kept 4. But I had this urge to grow food for my tiny infant, who would be 6 months in the summer and I wanted to grow the food that he would eat. Maybe it was this mothering instinct, after all, I was producing the milk to nurture him so why wouldn’t I then grow the food that would help continue my child’s growing and thriving? 

As the boys grew, I nannied for another family so that I could be with my boys more. And then I went to work at Starbucks. I was working there just in the evenings, only for a couple of months because it was important for me to spend the days with my kids, and also it was a job that offered health insurance and extra cash. From there, I quickly transitioned to the support center which is corporate, doing HR because I really love people. I think people are nuts, wonderful, and brilliant, and I love knowing them. I was working there, I was looking for different departments and dreaming of where I could work but it was never the right fit… And then my divorce happened and everything I knew just burned to the ground. 

It’s like watching the death of your future.

I think, whether we like to think it or not, you think the future is just gonna go one way and then it does not and you’re left holding the rubble. I just had the knowing this is not going to last. Do something different. 

As I was holding the rubble of what I thought my life was gonna look like, I had a thought: I just wanna have some fun! Let’s just do what I’ve always wanted to do, that I told myself I couldn’t do because it didn’t make any money because I had a family to support, because I needed something stable because yada yada yada.

I felt I didn’t have any piece of paper that said, This is Kate, she has been trained to do this, we give her the official recognition.

And yet, without that piece of paper that “proves” you can do what you are doing… you gave it a go.

Actually, a woman named Jenn Zabo - who is a landscape designer - is the one who gave me the pass. I ran into her at the (plant) nursery a few years later and I was able to thank her in person. 

The story goes…

My neighbor across the street, at the time, wanted to redo their entire yard. They had tons of brickwork and they wanted me to help them do it. I told them, ‘This is way above my pay grade, I can’t do it but let me find you someone who can.’ I had walked around my neighborhood and had seen the work of this woman, I thought it was awesome. I had an emotional reaction to what she was creating, so I stopped and told her that I liked her work and that my neighbor was looking for someone like her. Well, I ended up connecting the two of them. The interesting thing is that my neighbor would invite me to the meetings that she would have with Jenn Zabo. I’m sure Jenn must’ve wondered who is this neighbor who keeps showing up!! She designed an exquisite garden for them. 

What ended up happening is that the neighbor next door came and knocked on my door. Barbs said they didn’t have 65K to spend on the garden but really needed my help. I went to Jenn (Zabo) and asked her if she could help me demo that front yard… Basically, the neighbours were adjoint so I simply asked if her team could scrape everything since she had all the equipment there ready. She agreed we paid her a couple of extra grand, she scraped the entire front yard, I contracted with her to put a new patch of grass and… I was off for the races. I met with the clients, they showed me a couple of images of what they loved. Through all this, I had the one-year-old I was nannying with me in a pouch on the job site, at home I’d have my boys who were 4 and 6, my husband and I were no longer together…. and I would stay up at night dreaming of the garden and sketching it out, walk across the street and measure everything. I made a list of plants and Jenn suggested I can buy plants through her at the wholesaler. 

We meet on a Saturday morning, she had already submitted my order… I’m driving in my dad’s rented truck, Barbs following me on her Subaru.

I drove onto the commercial nursery lot and I just was overwhelmed with the sense of  << this is it >>. It was just a deep knowing in my soul that I had arrived in some place really significant.

We got all the plants. We got back to their garden and laid everything out, they wanted to transplant them all by themselves. At that point, I was going to trade them for a couple of bottles of wine. They planted all day, I went back the next day to check up on how things had been going. I’m standing there in front of the yard looking so beautiful, and Matt hands me a check for $500. I didn’t want to accept it at first but he said I had created something just as magical as that 65k garden next door but for 5k. He said he could not not pay me and that if I cash that check it means I’m starting my business. 

I cashed the check. I opened up a business account. That was the first garden, 8 years ago. I still drive by that garden, and I still stand behind every plant selection in it. 

After that first one, I was at a play date at a friend’s house … she began complaining about their front yard. I don’t even know how that came out of my mind but I said ‘I’m a landscape designer.’ Like who did I think I am, I’ve done one garden… but she asked me if she could hire me. She asked me how much I charge and I said on the spot $500. And there was my second client. 

When I had finished planting all the plants, I told myself, full of wonder, ‘Wow I’ve created two beautiful gardens in this world, I can do this!’ And I just kept going.

It wasn’t an overnight success. I did 2 gardens that first year. The next year I did 3 gardens. And then it just kept growing and growing, the scale and the complexity of what people wanted from me kept growing too. But that’s how it started. It literally started by saying yes. 

I don’t know if I told you but I did the Northwest Flower & Garden Show this year. It’s the second-largest garden show in the US. Initially, I was going to do a small city living garden, but one of the directors of the show got my application and told me he had already selected the people for the city living garden … however one of the main presenters had dropped out, he loved what I presented and offered me the opportunity instead to do a full garden. 

So this past year I fulfilled a 20-year-long dream and I created a garden for people to walk through. I think when you’re self-taught, you really question it all in your head, do I have the chops, is anyone going to look at this and think it’s beautiful, or that it has merit? At these shows you get to be judged by incredible landscape architects, landscape designers, and botanists… and I didn’t let that sink in until the very last day.

And how did it go?

Here is my GOLD MEDAL as a garden creator. 

8 years later… 

Yeah, I was given a gold medal for a 20-year dream of mine, back before this company was even in existence. I almost didn’t believe it when I went to the opening night. When I saw the gold medal sign I thought I was being punked! I was there with my partner and a dear friend I work with, and they both stood there and said, ‘OMG Kate, you got gold! You did it! Like, you did it!’ And I wasn’t even going for that, I just wanted to create something beautiful to introduce myself to the world. It was one of the highlights of my career, of my life… when do you get to fulfill a dream you had for decades?

What I’m observing is that genius doesn’t come easy. There may be a natural tendency but then it’s not like a walk in a meadow. A life lived in your genius may well be a thorny path, you may have many challenges and setbacks. Success may be very slow to come, if ever. Nonetheless, it’s gratifying.

In those early days, when my kids were young I would be a mom all day then in the evening do the dishes quickly and sit down until 2 AM working, designing, and being quiet. At times one of the kids would wake up to come get a glass of water and see me sitting alone in the kitchen, he’d ask me what time it was and worry I wouldn’t get enough sleep. I replied, ‘It’s ok, I’m doing what I love.’ But that’s the whole thing: I may be up to 1, 2, sometimes it’s been 3 o’clock in the morning but I’m in this moment of creation and it feels like I’m moving in this world. Yes, there was hustle, and yes I was tired, and yes those were long days but I was filled with the sense that I am creating magic in this world. I still am. 

Is this something you would do even if you weren’t paid?

Absolutely. I don’t think I would be able to help myself because I started by not being paid. People would just invite me for a cup of coffee and I’d say let’s dream about your garden. For me, the dream, the fantasy, and the creation of what’s possible fill my little body with so much energy. I love to play in fantasy land. 

Even when I’m not working I have a giant stack of gardening books that I am constantly reading and re-reading. My partner doesn’t get it, he wonders why after a full day of work, I come home and read about gardening. 

But that is the thing… There is no separation. It’s a job but it’s your life, it’s who you are.

Yes, there’s just a sense of flow between. Gardening is not a job, it’s like a compulsion within me. It’s also not just about the act of gardening, it’s the act of creation too. I want to create and evolve with it.

The other day I was redoing my partner’s front yard, as I was planting I was overcome by a fearful thought: what if I plant this all and it’s done? As if I’ve created this beautiful garden and then the journey is over. That is terrifying. I just never want the party to end.

I know it will never come a time in my life when I don’t garden or create in some shape or form. I have created my dream job. I’ve worked for my neighbors and for people who are in very public-facing roles where they are caretakers of estates that are over 1 acre. So people look at that and think, she’s made it! But I don’t actually feel that way at all. I maybe made it to a certain landing, like I maybe made it to a certain stair in the staircase, but now I’m feeling the staircase split in front of me. 

The analogy that I like to use is, I’m in the right car, on the right road, I’m headed in the right direction but I can’t really see where exactly I’m going. So the scary thing is, I’ve created this dream and now a new dream is emerging and I don’t know what that is. But to a certain extent, to capture a piece of this new dream, I’m gonna have to let a few things go to make space for whatever is coming in. I mean, I don’t know what the next 10 years are going to look like for me. I think there’s going to be an evolution that comes through. The other thing that feels almost a bit sad is that the dream that I’m currently living, is almost no longer the dream. Does that make sense? Like… the dream that I am living, was the dream of Kate 8 years ago. And now a new dream is emerging, but to take hold of that new dream I need to let a few pieces of this current dream go. It fills me with sadness.

What if you choose to view it in a different way, instead of from a “loss point of view”, imagine you are getting ready for a new adventure and you need to pack your bag with the essentials of this current dream that will help you on the next part of your journey.

The other thing I’m thinking of right as you’re speaking is instead of letting it go, embracing it as part of my heritage. The little townhouse garden is one of my favorite gardens. I love these tiny spaces that feel like you’re in a mouse-hole, I love an intimate garden. And my spaces are becoming bigger and bigger. Ok, the wild thing is that my spaces are becoming bigger and bigger, and the space of my business that is also becoming bigger and bigger is container design. I have a client who has over 1 acre and she has over 50 big pots! So I go and create all these baby landscapes throughout her property. I’m basically playing in the big fish bowl but with mouse gardens. I spend 4 months each year changing containers. That is incredible!

My garden is exactly a little mouse-hole and it’s all containers. A gem! I turned it into a paradise escape… and the beauty of containers is to be able to constantly change things. Not only do I move the containers around, but also I change pots to the plants every couple of months - which keeps me wondering if I’m nuts. But if I don’t do it the energy in my garden stagnates and goes down.

No, you’re not crazy! That fills me with so much joy to hear because I encounter so many people who are afraid of change. Plants are alive! A garden is meant to be changing, it’s meant to evolve. It is not meant to look the same all year round, and if it does look the same all year round that to me feels disingenuous, too static, like there’s not enough life here. I think plants feel that too and they give that off. To be quite honest, I think they look sad and shut down. …

If you’d like to connect with Kate, her business is Hello, Garden Design
Instagram & website.